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Archive for the ‘Travel’ Category

Glastonbury 2008 Monday, June 30th, 2008

Essential Glasto gear

I was fortunate enough to work backstage at this year’s Glastonbury which meant that I avoided the mud, the high prices and the discomfort of camping with thousands of punters. Some might argue that I wouldn’t have had the true Glastonbury experience, however when you’re in the press pit watching Crowded House, Leonard Cohen, the Verve and Amy Winehouse, these criticisms seem trivial.

Not that I especially liked any of the artists above. The fact was that as 120,000 people crammed themselves towards the Pyramid stage to glimpse a coloured dot bounce around on a very large screen, I sipped chilled beers behind the cattle fences. Largely oblvious to the struggle of the masses, I adjusted my complimentary earplugs with relative nonchelance.

I don’t feel the need to ramble on about the excitement and diversity of Glastonbury - the people, the food, the art and the various ‘villages’ - where you can do anything from learn to make wooden cutlery to meditate with modern day druids. My only reaction to the time I spent there, even counting the hours I was working, was that it wouldn’t displease me in the slightest if everyday of my life was like a day at Glastonbury. It would exhausting yes, but holy crap it would be fun.

Check out the BBC’s photostream: many photos of which I took and, to nearly all of them, added comments to.

Short bite of the apple Friday, June 20th, 2008

At my left, a 40-inch television with 600 cable channels. To my right, the cold remains of a deli sandwich. Outside in the heat, traffic snakes and shoots through walls of sunlight; horns in a constant state of beeping almost as if to shout out to the world: “I’m alive! I’m alive in New York!”

If Paris is a city for walking, then the Big Apple is one for skipping: mainly because you get around faster and at the same time, you can display an air of optimism (while hiding deep-seeded depression) that only the US can pull off.

Fortunately you don’t have to skip everywhere. Thanks to the subway and grid system of Manhattan streets, getting around New York is piece of a generous serving of your favourite cake (which, by the way, you probably get on every corner along with a bucket of watery coffee). The only hassle is trying to not get sidetracked by the mayhem. Smiling traffic conductors screaming at cars to move along; diners brandishing “All day burritos and jugs of beer”; flocks of garbage trucks; and of course, the thousands of people from everywhere and, judging by the mixture of fashion, everywhen.

New York could be described as London pushed into a tube and stood upright, sprayed with essence of extrovert. But it’s best not to make comparisons. This city is exciting in its own skin and I’m just about to walk out the door of my west mid-town apartment into the thick of it. More later.

Where the Eurostar goes Tuesday, June 10th, 2008

The smell of roasting rubber from the metro is a mere tickle compared to the hammering of fresh bread, seafood and cheese. Looking up to the grey sky, you don’t feel so bad as you would on a similar day across the Channel.

You’re in Paris.

What can be whittled from this majestic stick of French gold that hasn’t been said before? The streets are wide, the food is delicious and the people are French. Walking the streets, you feel as if you were in one colossal museum - there are monuments, ancient buildings, lively artist corners and French people everywhere. Like England, the hangover of lost colonial power is apparent in France, but it’s done with so much style; you can forgive them their pride and lose yourself in a empirical reverie of wine and fragrant butter sauces.

Far from being snobbish and rude, the people are warm and only happy to help you if you give their language a go. Every day I witnessed a tourist bark orders in English to a stunned service worker. In a bakery one afternoon I saw a man demand a badine in English and, with his arms stretched out, indicate the width of the loaf he had in mind. The teenager behind the counter, probably with a good level of English, was either too offended or too amused to react. The man looked and, probably to her, sounded like a zombie with a brand new Nikon strapped to his drooling head. Just before things hit melting point, a woman standing in line translated, the zombie got his bread and retreated. Imagine if a French person did that in Australia: they would be immediately sent to a detention facility and deported the following decade.

So determined to play by the rules, I stammered out what remained of my French language skills and surprisingly, I got by relatively well. Some were flattered that I’d taken the time as an anglophone to even open a French grammar book, which is a bit of a polite exaggeration but it was a nice compliment nonetheless. The folk selling trinkets beneath the Eiffel Tower and those trying to scam money weren’t so appreciative when I told them to fuck off.

In the areas where tourists tend to congregate you are guaranteed to be approached by someone asking you for money, directly or indirectly, at least once every 15 minutes. I learnt to ignore pleas of “Do you speak English?”, but there was one trick I’d never seen before - someone would pretend to pick up something from the ground in front of you, a ring or a coin, and then present it to you as if you’d dropped it. Insisting that you take the trinket, they congratulate you and then proceed to ask you for money to compensate them for having brought such good fortune upon your package holiday.

Va te faire!

Peeing on flies Thursday, April 10th, 2008

Ahh, Amsterdam - the watery princess of the North looking up into the oceans. Exuding chaos and beauty through its sinewy canals. Home to a thousand bicycles and iron hooks from which you can dangle furniture from your storage lofts. Magnet for people of all persuasions - particularly young continentals looking to get stoned.

The novelty of Amsterdam takes a few visits to wear down because you’re hardly on the plane on the way back from wherever you came from and you’re planning your next weekend to the city. This of course is due to your still altered state of consciousness whereby you hold the unwavering belief that you could subsist on joints, hot chips and cake for the rest of your terrestrial existence. Reality often kicks in when you are asked to communicate with someone born of the prevailing system and all you can manage is a string of warbling nonsense surrounded by pauses long enough in which to pour a pint of Guinness.

However Amsterdam is more than this: you will notice, if you are a male, or care to frequent the male toilets, that they paint tiny flies on the urinals. The idea is that you will instinctively aim at the fly when you piss and not on the floor, nor presumably on the person standing next to you. This can only mean that people in the Netherlands either take great delight in urinating on insects or on the floor, but not both at the same time.

You can also see the world’s largest collection of working bikes near the Central Station, crammed into a split-level parking lot on the canal. It is a marvel to witness how this modern city functions without reliance on the car, unlike so many other western metropolises. The prevalence of the bike has led to some astonishingly innovative two-wheeled contraptions such as the bike/trailer combination; the “bike for the whole family” bike, with a seat for mum and dad and two kids; and the reclining bike, which is the only personal displacement vehicle in which you can rest, smoke a doobie and exercise at the same time. The unicycle is notably absent.

A flying f*%kup Friday, March 28th, 2008

You’ve spent years and swathes of cash planning a major upgrade. Importing the best engineers, business consultants, designers and researchers, you’ve planned your project down to the finest detail, assessing risks, inviting all the right stakeholders to contribute and undertaking stringent testing procedures before launch.

There are no cutting corners and no getting it wrong - you’re upgrading once of the most important and most highly trafficked sites in the world and any downtime would have a severe effect on a large number of people.

Going live - the moment you’ve been waiting for for what seems like years has come. Are we ready? Have we checked all the systems? Is everyone trained on how to deal with the infrastructure and networks? Is our backup plan prepared?

“Ok! Flick the switch!”

Nothing.

“Flick it again!”

Still nothing.

The pressure is mounting. Complaints start to trickle in. Your visitors are wondering what is going on as there is no service. Total chaos ensues.

No, I’m not talking about a website now, but Heathrow Terminal 5. My trip to Amsterdam to see Mark Knopfler in concert, planned months ago, has been thwarted by “a catalogue of errors“.

A Romanian Easter Wednesday, March 26th, 2008

“What types of agricultural goods does your country export?” is not a typical ice breaker you’d use in conversation, but in rural Romania, where every square metre of land has been tilled for some purpose, it’s a serious question. And they expect an answer.

The relationship between people and land is more evident in Romania than any European country I’ve visited. Transylvanian roads are dotted with locals selling essentials such as eggs, turnips, faggots (bundles of sticks), home-made wines and cheeses, baskets and a products from every exploitable environmental resource. The land is their livelihood, their playground and sadly their rubbish tip.

Man at Bran markets

While conservative with their consumption, Romanians seemed liberal with their wastage. Along the roadside, the fields are littered with plastic bags and bottles. Spectacular snow-capped mountains and forests are connected by rusted pipes than run across the landscape towards the giant cooling towers of industrial towns. Indeed the country has a run-down air about it: outside Bucharest the buildings appear exhausted and stained; high-density apartment blocks queue beside abandoned factories apparently waiting to collapse to make way for the next generation. Spurts of EU funding are visible: dual carriage ways connect major centres, although it is still common to share them with donkey-drawn carts carrying wood, manure or entire families.

Coming from western Europe, Romania appears insanely cheap. You can feast on a local dish of grilled chicken with ham and garlic potatoes, polenta and mountains of fresh bread, a few litres of Ursu (the local beer named after bears) for around £7 or 30 RON (Lei). The average Romanian wage for a worker in a city company we were told is something in the vicinity of 500 Euros, with the rest of the country receiving a lot less, but they survive because inflation is low and so is the cost of housing. But people are nervous about the shift to the Euro which they say will drive up the prices, like they did everywhere else.

The low wages are probably why Romania jammed with Romanian tourists - it’s just too expensive to travel elsewhere. The castle of Bran where the Royal family once lived and, supposedly, Vlad Dracul, teems with Romanian travellers and their families with the odd Spanish or French and even Australian (!) making up the minority of gawking, photo-carrying pilgrims. Nevertheless, always on the look out for a business opportunity, market owners sell their homogeneous wares in these areas hoping to entice tourists to buy tacky Dracula mugs and t-shirts, wooden swords and vampire teeth.

Doing business in Romania is a rather informal affair which might come as a surprise to unsuspecting westerners who expect contracts, offices or even business names. In Romania these commercial excesses are optional. The rental car dealer from which we hired our 4WDs (one of which wasn’t a 4WD) consisted of two gents in full denim with bad teeth in the car park. They were nice enough and didn’t try to con us, although at 250 Euros for each car, we knew they had the better end of the bargain.

The hostel in Bucharest, which we found only by luck since there was nothing external to indicate that we’d arrived, was a converted house or nunnery with only three rooms, each fitting eight people. Even the girl working at reception was forced to sleep in a plastic banana chair behind the desk. About to retire for the night, I passed her thinking that she was taking a rest,

“Feeling tired?”

“Yes, hopefully tonight I’ll be able to get some sleep”, she said and smiled as she then proceeded to prepare her make shift bed out of what I’d have felt uncomfortable on after one hour (even after a dip on some sun drenched beach, a margherita and a 15 minute massage).

Our attempts at speaking the local language were met with mixed reactions. According to our taxi driver in Bucharest, who thought it would be a riot to hear four foreigners stammering instructions in Romanian for quarter of an hour before revealing that he spoke English, told us that half the country spoke English to some degree. His claimed seemed rather dubious in our experience. In Brasov our linguistic repertoire was tested on numerous occasions - our local corner store consisted of a half-metre square hole in the wall and was run by a friendly lady in a grey apron with a profound patience for the warbling of foreigners. The fact that we couldn’t see what we wanted to buy thwarted our usual method of pointing and thrusting money in all directions however our pronunciation of lapte (milk) and pâinea (bread) must have been half close as both products were handed to us with efficiency.

I was impressed with the way Romanians were interested in the world beyond their borders. At a remote petrol station, the same guy who had inquired about the state of primary industry exports in Australia also informed me that he’d learned English from the television, and much of it from an Australian drama called McLeod’s Daughters, which was hugely popular in Romania. His lack of twang in his accent made me suspicious, but to his credit, his spoken English was good. I watched some Romanian television while there and can admit that I didn’t experience any of this osmotic effect with the exception of picking up that the word crap means carp and that fried crap is an infinitely entertaining item to read on a menu.

Romania is known to have the largest population of European bears roaming around the wilderness. We didn’t see any but we did see many dogs. There are hoards of them, everywhere. Our guide books reported that there were 200,000 stray dogs in the country, but it seemed like a gross exaggeration when we looked about. You’ll see dogs in the cities rummaging through bins for food, sleeping dogs, lone dogs simply sitting in a fields doing nothing or marauding packs. There are dogs of all breeds (although mostly of the mongrel variety) and sizes. The strange part was that most of them seemed healthy unlike their best friends who, in the rural areas, were weathered and bent from whatever struggle they’d endured throughout their lives. Perhaps it was a symbol that, even in a former impoverished Eastern block country, there are opportunities to be had by the tough and street-smart.

I’d go back to Romania in a second. Everyone was very nice to us, even the policemen who pulled us over for going 70 in a 50 zone (even though we were driving at the same speed as the lorry filled with turnips in front of us) and only gave us a warning despite our licences not being valid. And the country side, beyond the rubbish is in some areas untouched and pure. What really impressed upon me though is the air of optimism - it’s a country that is growing and having joined the EU last year, you get the feeling that the people suddenly feel part of a world that for so long seemed to be passing them by.

On the edge in SW2 Saturday, March 8th, 2008

Brixton is where I chose to hang my hat in London. This reveals nothing special until I tell you that my image of England before coming here for the first time was one in which people were a bit uptight but generally good-humoured with a wonderful comprehension of satire, wearing brown corduroy and emanating that air of sophistication that used to be revered back in the colonies. It was further coloured by the fantasy of a fine pub-loving culture and fresh rain on ancient streets where the expectation that the Goodies could leap out at you from any corner dressed as nuns or amuse you with some comparable hilarity, was reasonable to entertain.

So you can imagine how my illusions were shattered when I first laid eyes on my new suburb.

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